“Down the White Rabbit Hole” Part 4

Because the abuse in that facility was so rampant, it is no wonder that both the girls and the boys were being sexually abused. However, because that was so normal for us, the ones being abused never spoke up. I did do some investigating an there is a group of Boys that were sexually abused in that facility who are having the courage to speak up.

4 more men come forward; Alberta priest faces additional sex assault charges

Gordon William Dominey, 63, is now facing a total of 18 sexual assault charges and nine gross indecency charges.

READ MORE: Alberta priest charged in connection with alleged historic sexual assaults

On Feb. 6, the Edmonton Police Service announced it was laying five charges of sexual assault and five charges of gross indecency against Dominey. The charges stem from five alleged incidents at the Edmonton Youth Development Centre in the 1980s. The complainants were all youth at the incarceration facility at the time of the alleged incidents.

It is so heartbreaking to me how many youth that have been victimized, continued to be victimized by those professing to be extending the hand of help, safety, refuge. It is deplorable to me that any one professing to be a humanitarian or person of spiritual intent uses that to get close to victims, in order to cause them even more harm.

It has taken me two decades to share my experience, so I understand why it has taken them two decades too.

An incident I recall is one that haunts me to this day. So much is vague memories or foggy. However, some things are hard to forget, no matter how much I wish I could. I was so drugged up, all I remember is being naked and men coming in to solitaire and shutting the door. I remember one man getting down on the mat with me, while another man stood up against a wall and watched, as the other man wrestled with me, as I tried to get away. I was so tired of fighting, I am not even sure how long I had been struggling for. I blacked out most of the incident, and I’m sure there are many instances I have blocked out. Although they do come out if I drink or use drugs, which in another segment I will talk about the drug and alcohol abuse. I do recall one female worker being present, however, she removed herself from the solitary confinement space. I remember her looking at me as she was leaving the room. What I remember most about that event is the look of contempt on those two men’s faces. There was no compassion or empathy what so ever.

One day my worker called me to the office and asked me if I was addicted to drugs or alcohol. remember I was 12 when they incarcerated me and I was now about 15 and a half. I was eleven going on 12 when I was put in the detention center, so all in all I had been incarcerated for around four years. She wasn’t seriously asking me if I was an addict was she? The only drugs I took during that time was the drugs they gave me, I had not even been outside the facility in all those years! How was I going to get drugs? No one ever came to see me! What a odious woman!

Because I had been around teens who were into illicit drugs I had some working knowledge what they were about, even though I have never seen it done or even what they looked like. I remember asking why she would ask me this, and she stated that she wanted to see if ADAAC would be helpful for me. I was dumbfounded..seriously? These people were more crazy than me! I saw a chance to actually get out of the facility, however, I did not realize that after being locked up for so many years it was not like when I was a child living on Whyte Ave with my siblings. I thought I would be accompanied by a staff member to integrate me back into society. That was not the case, she gave me a map and bus fare for the bus, and sent me out of the building by my self!

I reconciled myself to me, myself and I, and am ok with the fact I am complicated. Tammy 2019

What the hell was wrong with these people!! I stood out side that building for a few minutes and just looked at it. It looked so very large to me. This was the first time I had been outside the facility with out a staff member, I felt so alone, panicked, anxious and very afraid. I did find the ADDAC office, however, I never went in. Instead I was going to take a trip to Whyte ave and go to my old home, and just look at it. I never even got that far, instead I ran into a girl I knew from lock up. I told her I was running away from YDC because they didn’t want me there any more, I was to much for them to handle. That is what I told myself. They created a monster and then just let her out of the cage, what the hell is wrong with those people? However, I was afraid, this was a big world and I was still a small child in my mind.

Children who are subjected to abuse have the natural flow of human development broken, and can become frozen. Erickson speaks to the human theory of development. I was frozen at the emotional mentality of about age two. Tammy 2019

My emotional development was stunted to a point were I was like a two year old. Tina.C. took me under her wing. It became official I was now a fugitive, and after 24 hours a Canada wide warrant was issued for my arrest. I became one of Canada’s most wanted at the age of 15, and the biggest crime I ever committed was stealing a candy bar when I was ten….All because I ran away from a correctional facility. Back then under the Government system I was ruled by, you run away from any correctional facility, no matter if you committed a crime or not, you have committed a crime by going awol. This means even though I had never been sentenced with a crime, I was deemed a criminal, because I resided in a correctional institution.

I only knew I was wanted by the authorities because I saw my face plastered on a poster in the wainwright police detachment. You could imagine my shock, that they wanted me arrested! I got my but out of the detachment on the double! I will share about that in a different piece as that was further down the road. For now, with Tina I was blissfully unaware I had A warrant out for my arrest. I thought my biggest worry was child welfare, boy was I in for a reality check.

In over a century of youth justice legislation in Canada, there have been three youth justice statutes: the Juvenile Delinquents Act (19081984), the Young Offenders Act (YOA) (1984-2003), and the Youth Criminal Justice Act (YCJA) (2003-present). A set of amendments to the YCJA was adopted by Parliament in 2012.

I met the first YOYO or Young Offender to be incarcerated, it was a 12 year old girl who was caught in a stolen car. I do not recall if she stole it or someone else did, and she just went for the ride. I think she was just along for the ride as she looked like she was 12, very young looking. However, looks can be deceiving so maybe she did hot wire it. I met her before I was transferred to the open unit. If she by chance reads this, “Tammy, me, says hello, and hopes you had an amazing wonderful life.” I was transferred to the open unit very shortly after that.

I would also like to send a thank you to Lauren, who came into my room on the open unit and prayed with me as I gave my will and life over to the care of Jesus. I felt an immense peace come over me. I didn’t understand a high power, nor did I know a higher power. However, I do believe my Higher Power kept me as safe as he could in the coming years, when there was so many times I should have died by another’s hands, or my own.

Alice in Wonderland Quotes “It’s no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then.” …

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